The Social-Democratic Republic of Die Friedlichelaender is a colossal, socially progressive nation, ruled by President Andreas Held with a fair hand, and renowned for its rum-swilling pirates, daily referendums, and smutty television. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 8.793 billion Friedlichens hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The enormous, liberal, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Environment, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Heiterstadt. The average income tax rate is 99.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Die Friedlichelaenderian economy, worth a remarkable 1,817 trillion Pfunds a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing and Tourism. Average income is an amazing 206,700 Pfunds, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The delay between passed legislation and real world implementation is often a decade or longer, stranded mountaineers can watch livestreamed footage of their rescues, libraries are now installed with jacuzzis and mini-bars, and stuttering trypanophobes are doomed never to marry. Crime is totally unknown. Die Friedlichelaender's national animal is the Taube, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Die Friedlichelaender is ranked 1,226^th in the world and 25^th in The Leftist Assembly for Highest Foreign Aid Spending, scoring 5,007.07 on the Clooney Contribution Index.